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| Welcome to the exciting world of Hyper Chess.
This game is the board game equivalent of Heroin. It's incredibly
addictive, and if you don't do it right, you can actually end up
with a sore arm. This page will give you a little history about the
game, then provide you with detailed instructions on how to play. |
A Little History
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| Hyper Chess was invented in the summer of 2004
aboard the yacht Emmaus
during one of the many times that the watch I wasn't in was on
sailing duty. I don't want to take all the credit for this wonderful
game, because that would be wrong. The game was the product of two
brilliant minds, my own and that of a Mr. John Clark. He's from
Dundee, so it was a bit of a surprise to me that he was actually
rather intelligent. He'd brought with him on the cruise a travel
chess set, which had two pawns missing, and a travel monopoly set,
which was complete. Using these basic elements, some pieces of
paper, some ink from a pen, our shared genius, and an urge to fill
the boredom of doing nothing, Hyper Chess was invented. |
| The original game was alright, but slightly
boring. You may not know me, but those that do know that I'm not
particularly good at games of skill, but luckily, neither was he. We
were equally skilled in the game, but it wasn't particularly
exciting. However, during a game of normal chess with one of the
other crewmembers, Ross something something (Sorry, no good at
surnames I'm afraid. Hopefully someone else from the cruise will
remember and remind me.), I was checkmated rather quickly, and so
out of desperation I ordered a "Super King Transport Move", which
involved swapping our kings. I still went on to lose the game, but
an idea was born. |
| Discussing this with John after I lost, we
realised that this was exactly what our game was missing. We decided
to make it a game of skill, as well as a game of chance. So we added
the Bawgle. This was a dice roll at the end of each turn, and the
outcome of the two dice would have an effect on the game. We
continually added what combinations effected the board until we
reached the Bawgles we have presently. However, there was something
still lacking. It was quite by accident we discovered what it was.
Out of boredom, rather than roll the dice, I just hit the sofa they
were lying on, and they bounced into the air. That was it. The game
was now perfect. You move, You block, You Bawgle. It was brilliant. |
| We weren't the only ones who thought so. The
Hyper Chess craze quickly spread throughout the boat. When John and
I weren't playing, then someone else was. We soon realised we'd
unleashed a monster. It wasn't long until we'd decided to hold the
first annual world Hyper Chess championships. I managed to make it
into the semi-finals, with a final Super King Transport Move helping
me beat Ross on the last move. More excitement was to come in the
final though, with Derek McPhail and Stuart Blahblahson (again, I
have no idea of his Surname) having a rather exciting game, with
many Super Optional Hug/Handshake Moves. It came down to the last
move, Derek had Stuart Totally trapped, there was nothing he could
do, and it came to Derek's Bawgle. He Bawgled a six. Everyone was on
the edge of their seats, except me, who was standing as referee to
the match. He Bawgled the second dice. A six. Super King Transport
Move. It was over. The first world Hyper Chess Champion was Stuart
Blahblahson... |
How To Play
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You will need:
- A chess board (or any other 8x8 playing board, such as
checkers or othello)
- Two dice
- Two unique pieces, one of each colour (such as the kings in
normal chess)
- Thirty pieces of any shape or size, fifteen of each colour
(such as the rest of the normal chess pieces)
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 Set
the board up like the picture to the left. Sorry about the
crappy pictures, but you know how well I
can't draw. On the board to
the left, you can see the two Kings of Hyper Chess. As in normal
chess, the white player goes first. However, to make up for
this, the black king is known as "The Dude", for he is far
cooler than the white one could ever be. That is why some
players prefer to be black, even though going white may help you
win.
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 Like
in normal chess, the King can move in one square in any
direction. Unlike in normal chess, the goal is not to take the
other king, otherwise it would probably be impossible for the
black player in this starting configuration, the goal is to
prevent the other player from moving at the start of their turn.
Looking at this board, you're probably thinking to yourself "but
that's impossible, no matter where I move my king, the other
player's king can always move". And you're right. However, each
move comes in three parts, and moving your king is only the
first part. Say for example, you'd made a move like in the
picture to the right. You would then move on to part two of your
move. The block. |
 In
the block, you place one of your other fifteen pieces, known as
blockers, anywhere on the board. When you first start to play,
you'll probably make moves like the one to the left, putting the
blocker next to the other King, but far away from your own. A
useful tip is that your own King can also be used as a blocker,
so that you have the equivalent of having two blockers in your
one move. Of course, this can also result in your own King being
blocked in, so use your own judgement. So far, the game has been
an interesting intellectual distraction, and hasn't really
resulted in much fun. Don't worry, a lot of fun comes in
the next part of the move. The Bawgle |
| In the Bawgle, you
roll a pair of dice. Well, you can roll them, but quite frankly,
that's boring. Instead, it is recommended you "Bawgle" them.
Bawgle, when used as a verb, means to bounce dice from a sofa or
cushion such that when they land, it has the same effect as
having rolled them. Bawgle, when used as a noun, means the
special moves that result from having Bawgled. Now that that's
cleared up, let me give you a list of different Bawgles,
what they mean and how likely it is to roll them. |
Double One or Double Six: Super King Transport Move
One and Six or Six and One: Super Blocker Beam Down
Double Three: Super Blocker Beam Up
Double Two or Double Four or Double Five: Super King Hyper
Move
One and Three or Three and One or Three and Six or Six and
Three: Super Optional Hug/Handshake Move |
| If the
player rolls a Super King Transport Move then the two
Kings swap position. This can be quite an annoying move at
times, but it is also quite a relief if you happen to be losing.
Chance: 1/18 |
| If the
player rolls a Super Blocker Beam Down then the player
gets to place an extra blocker anywhere on the board. This is a
useful move a lot of the time, and hardly ever annoys the player
who rolls it. Chance: 1/18 |
| The
Super Blocker Beam Up is the least likely roll in the game,
and at times can be slightly annoying, but it can also save your
life. When rolled, the player gets to pick up any of their own
blockers from the board, and the other player is not allowed to
place a blocker on the square that was just vacated for one move
Chance: 1/36 |
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Believe it or not, the Super King Hyper Move can lose you
a game, but only if you're stupid. When rolled, the player gets
to move their king an extra square. One of the more likely moves
in the game, it can often save you from being blocked in
Chance: 1/12 |
| And
now we come to the last proper Bawgle, the Super Optional
Hug/Handshake Move. This move came about because originally
you only got Bawgles from ones and sixes and threes, so when you
got a mix of ones and threes or sixes and threes, you felt you
deserved something. What we felt you deserved was a hug, but
oddly enough, with a boat full of guys, this wasn't a popular
move, so we allowed a handshake as well. Chance: 1/9 |
| Overall
Chance of a Bawgle each turn: 1/3 |
 You
win the game by preventing the other player from moving
their King at the start of their move, such as in the
picture to the left. Although the picture to the left is
incredibly unlikely, in it the white player has just won,
unless he were to get a Super King Transport Move in
which case he would possibly lose. I am sure you are
suitably confused by now, having lost all understanding for
the game, and probably thinking it is rubbish, for those
I've explained it to without having them play it do not
think it particularly fun. However, those I have actually
taught to play this game, from eleven years old to however
old Malcolm Lumsden is, have all really enjoyed this game. |
Other Little Rules
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| Super Death Lose Move: It is
possible to Bawgle too hard, and cause pieces on the board
to move or fall off. If this happens, the Bawgler who
Bawgled too hard automatically loses the match. If you are
playing with the board on the same surface as you are
Bawgling on (such as a sofa, as opposed to Bawgling on the
sofa, but having the board on the table) and the Bawgler
moves the board to prevent a Super Death Lose Move
then the other player gets to take disciplinary actions. |
 Super
Optional Handshake Move: Unlike with the hug option of
this move, there is a special handshake that must be
used if doing the handshake option. To the right is a
blurryish photo of it. Click on it to see a larger photo
appear. |
| Super Speak The Names Move: When
you Bawgle a Bawgle (or roll a special move in English) you
have to say the name of it really, really fast. This is fun,
and mandatory. Anyone who does not speak the name fast
enough is liable for disciplinary actions from the other
player. |
| Super Bawgle End Move: Imagine
the scene. You have your opponent's king trapped. You know
that should you Bawgle a Super King Transport Move then your
game is probably over, but if you don't, then you will win.
In situations like these the Super Bawgle End Move
comes into play to add to the tension. You only Bawgle one
dice at a time. |
| Disciplinary Actions: Basically
the disciplinary action is you get to slap the other person.
Please do not do it particularly hard, as Hyper Chess is a
nice game. |
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